Years ago, I bought this cooler/icebox/igloo thing. I was living in warmer climates, usually made a lunch for myself, and it was nice having something that would keep it edible until noon. It was a good purchase.
Years went by and I no longer used the cooler as a lunchbox. Instead of a meal I started stuffing other random items into it: chap-stick, an extra shirt, maybe a grocery item or two. It was so god-damned convenient. How could I resist? How could I know?
And now? I take it everywhere. Instead of leaving crap lying around I just haul it all over the place in my cooler. I'm more likely to forget my wallet than I am to forget this little blue guy.
So how about we open it up and take a look inside.
Let's do an inventory of my dark descent:
- 1 paperback: Christine by Stephen King
- 1 iPod, with earbud headphones
- 1 pair of wool gloves
- 1 expired insurance identification card (I should probably toss that)
- 1 pair of sunglasses
- 1 pair of prescription glasses in a Dolce&Gabanna case I randomly kleptoed years ago.
- 1 Christmas gift, which shall not be named
- 1 package of expired BJ's coupons
- 2 tubes of chapstick
- 1 multi-ink pen
- 1 sharpie
- 3 packages of Stevita sweetener
- 1 notebook
- 10 or so receipts
- And a bunch of other crap.
So there you go. All that's missing are the tampons.
I have a plastic purse.