Magicians and Looters: Nyn Idle

She doesn't consciously realize it, but somewhere in the back of her head she's skipping rope.

Greenlight: Tiny Barbarian DX

TinyB is kicking ass on Kickstarter, so now it's time for the next step that all indie titles must take: Steam Greenlight. Don't let this game fall into obscurity. Get it on the front page of the Steam store!

And no, you can't leave a comment on Greenlight about how you're tired of 8-bit games, or how the game belongs on Newgrounds because it looks like it was made with Flash, or how this game looks like something else you played that isn't even in the same fucking genre because ten-billion other fucking idiots already posted those comments for you!

A historically accurate merchant simulator does not look like Skyrim! What the fuck is wrong with you people?


Sorry. That was off-topic, and TinyB's Greenlight page is almost 100% praise, but I've spent a little too much time checking out some of the other, less successful games; and it's rubbed off on me in a bad way. Constructive criticism on Greenlight is like an intricate, high-quality game on XBLIG.

Magicians and Looters: Brent Jumps

Youtube: Written by a Kid

1. Have a kid tell a story.

2. Get actors and animators to make the story come to life.

3. Post it on Youtube.

Every episode of Written by a Kid is fantastic, but Emily is probably my favorite storyteller. They must have shipped her off to a psych ward right after the video was over.

Magicians and Looters: Screenshot: Vienna Crossing the Chasm

Greenlight: A Hat in Time

The Hero: Hat Kid
The Villain: Moustache Girl

Environment interaction is thorough. Controls look solid. Way too charming for its own good. I really, really want this game greenlit.

(Also: WindWakerWindWakerWindWakerWindWaker)

Magicians and Looters: Brent Leaps Forward

Kickstarter: Tiny Barbarian DX

Especially those jumps right after 0:22, the game just looks like so much fun to play.

Michael Stearns is talented, he's got a stable of awesome games that not nearly enough people know about, and he wants to make his biggest, best game yet.

• Eat chicken you found in the garbage.
• Fight endless hordes of evil (or just misguided) warriors.
• Save the most beautiful ladies that can fit into a 16x16 pixel box.

I'd like to think that I've shown restraint when it comes to never using this blog as a platform for focusing on charity and donation stuff. I'd like to think that this blog is a sacred place reserved for bad humor and video game talk. This is a gamer temple, and I have no right to panhandle on its steps.

But fuck you, I want to play TinyB!

Kickstart it now!

Magicians and Looters: Nyn Jumping Vertically

I like the hair on this one a lot more than Nyn's last animation.

Magicians and Looters: Vienna Running

"Where the hell are my pants?!"

Magicians and Looters: Nyn Jumps

This stupid animation took for-freakin'-ever! Segmented body armor, loose clothing, and long hair... what was I thinking?

Magicians and Looters: Vienna Leaps Nowhere

No more simulating an actual jump. I'm just going to post these animations moving in place ('cause they look better that way).

Magicians and Looters: Vienna Leaps Forward

From a practical perspective, this is like the weirdest pose you could possibly make when falling, but it looks hella ninja and that's good enough for me.

Magicians and Looters: PSA

Magicians and Looters: Telescoping Node

BVVVVVVvvv.... *click*

Magicians and Looters: Ninja Wizards

Like Mr. Wiggybottom, this is a character that was made for MAL but never found its way into the game.

Unlike Mr. Wiggybottom, the ninja wizards actually look pretty good.

Movie (Spoilers): Prometheus

Imagine if the nation of Iran watched "Chariots of the Gods" waaaaay too many times, and then launched a spaceship to some distant planet where they kickstarted life, or maybe just humanity? That part isn't very clear.

But it's irrelevant, because countless years have passed and your world and its civilizations have changed countless times before you were even born, so you don't even know that Iran watched "Chariots of the Gods" over a dozen times, not that you'd care, because people believed anything in the seventies.

But this chick who just woke you up from cryo-sleep doesn't get it. She seems to think that you've got all the answers, and obviously you'd know why Iran did that one thing in the ancient past, and obviously you'd have a very important reason for deciding to kill off the human race with the freakiest bio-engineered shit imaginable all these years later.

So if I were that proto-human in Prometheus and I woke up to a bunch of questions that were that stupid? I'd probably start ripping some heads off, too.


+ Pretty as fuck.
- B-grade slasher films have more believable characters with more common sense.

Magicians and Looters: Morg Engineer

If we could see into his head, I imagine we'd hear this music playing.

Magicians and Looters: Vienna Jumping

Very fluid, but without any vertical movement it looks hella weird.

Vienna lives in a pants-optional world.

If it was just her head moving she'd look like a freaky bird woman.

Magicians and Looters: Nevermind, I'm All Done

Ha! You lose tileset! I beat you! I beat the poo out of you!

Brainless Belgian: Nothing Done Today

Very fresh stuff.

Magicians and Looters: Putting a Room Together

Minecraft: Cart-Jacked

Bro: "A chicken stole my minecart!"

Me: "What?!"

Bro: "A chicken stole my minecart! It jacked my ride!"

Me: "What are you talking about? Chickens can't steal minecarts!"

Bro: "He was on the track so I got out of the cart to knock him out of the way, and then he jumped in and took off!"

Me: "Hold on. You were heading to the north station, right? Let me go check it out, because if a chicken really did jack your ride then there should be..."

Youtube Channel: Crash Course

Remember history in high school?

Well, picture that, except that your teacher is a lot more interested in the subject he's teaching, and he's heavily edited, and he isn't Euro-centric, and there's tons of animations in-between all the talking to help get the point across, and instead of memorizing a bunch of throwaway information you're actually learning things.


Crash Course: World History

Magicians and Looters: Square Infestation

Stupid squares. Why do they have to be so easy to make and place into a tileset, yet look so dated and unappealing?

Magicians and Looters: Pipes and Stuff Complete

I never get to say this: I'm really happy with how this turned out.

Probably needs a bit more color...